In Defence of the Good & the Happy

" If you always do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten." - Anthony Robbins

Human nature fascinates me, always has.  From body language, to voices,habits, beliefs, handwriting, the reason why they do the things that they do and believe in the things that they believe in...just fascinates me to no end. 

I enjoy reading inspirational stories, books, blogs, listening to seminars and just seeing the different views of people on the same subjects.  No two people have the same views on things, everyone is entitled to their opions and thoughts; however ...I have a need to defend the happy and the good of our world, because it seems that we have become the minority in the game of life. 

I have been reading a few things on-line the past couple of weeks, and I know that if I don't like it, don't read it.  How about the naysayers and the introverts, the "woe is me", the haters, the angry - why do they get to so publicly vent and bash others?  I think it is time to take the blame off the happy and the good for the reason your life is the way it is, when you point a finger at someone - look at your hand, three fingers are pointing back at you. 

I use to be a very angry and sad person.  Everyone and everything was to blame for why my life was the way it was...until I realized that I had to take responsibility for my part in the mistakes and disappointments, and being angry and sad all the time...was getting me nowhere pretty fast.

Since we can't see ourselves without mirrors, what you like and don't like in someone, is a mirror of what is inside you.  Good or bad, we need to own all parts of ourselves, love them and own them.

I am empathic, it makes me ill to hear comments made about people I don't know, the ones that I do - it breaks my heart and I cry for not only them, but for the one that uttered the words of hate and spite.  Don't spite someone, don't complain ( it gets you no where - trust me), don't hate, don't burn with rage at the world, the people you live with, work with, play with - open your heart, change your view on things, don't expect someone or something to come along and fix you - you need to fix yourself, you are in control of your life and happiness - if you allow people to upset you, you give your power away. When I was angry and sad, all my anger was going to the wrong people - the truth of the matter is, I didn't like myself very much, and that is why everything would happen the way it did. I was angry at me, and who I had become without even knowing it was happening.

I know where I have been and who I use to be, and because of that - I know I never want to be that person again, I accept that at the time - that is who I needed to be, but it is much better to wake up and know that you can do everything you want to do, even if it doesn't happen as fast as you would like it to - enjoying each day and knowing who you are, and loving it.  Ask God, your higher power - to help you, to open your heart, to others, but more importantly...to yourself, because until you love yourself with all your being, nothing will change. 

Love something about yourself everyday...and you will see, that you will love that same thing in others.

Be brave, and may God be with you.

xoxo
BT&HB

The Lesson of The Golden Buddha

" Within each of us lies a solid gold treasure.  This golden essence is our spirit, pure and magnificent, open and glowing.  But this gold has been covered up by a hard shell of clay.  The clay comes from our fear. It is our social mask; the fact we show the world.  Unconcealing your shadow reveals your mask.  We must look at this mask with love and compassion for there is great value in understanding what we hide behind." -From Debbie Ford's book; "The Dark Side of the Light Chasers".

I read these words this morning, reading them hit home, I am only about 75 pages into my latest read, and read a lot I do.  It is a way for me to escape, perhaps avoid doing what I need to do, and to day dream of the life I know is waiting for me.  This words brought me to my knees and opened a flood gate....I felt this coming on for weeks, and now I understand why. 

I am many things, but I have buried a lot, hidden a lot, and carried a lot.  I am tired, tired of failing, tired of trying, tired of being the person I pretended to be for the sake of acceptance.  I owned my shadow sides this morning - and I am no longer ashamed, because they served me and stayed with me, so I could bring my true self back to life. 

Our outer shell is the you who faces the world. I know my outer shell says many things, but my shadow sides are the ones that have hunted me the most.  I try to be helpful, compassionate, healthy and loving, but at the same time, there is a part of me that is lazy, unhealthy and not so loving, and sometimes rude.  I don't want to hide anymore - I guess what I am trying to say is, I love and accept, the bad, the lazy, the not so smart, the phony, the liar, the ugly, the hard, the bitch, the thief, the lame, the geek, the failure and the little fat girl inside of me.  I own them - and owing them allows me to let go - to love all parts of myself,....once and for all. 

This book has opened my eyes in ways I never thought possible.  I am going to chisel away at my shell, piece by piece...my shinning essence will emerge, one chip at a time.  That is what has been holding me back.  I don't want change for  6 months or a year, I want this change to be permanent.  I want what I want, and it wants me - but finally seeing why I get to the top of the wall....and then slide all the way back down, is because the parts of me I am hiding.  I expends too much energy to keep them hidden, this is who I am - and to every bad there is a good: where there is hate, there is love, where there is fear, there is strength, where there is rudeness, compassion, where there is shame, there is acceptance. 

As the story is told, a golden Buddha was covered in clay to prevent it from being stolen during the war, the shell protected the Buddha from theft.  Do you think after the monks chiseled the shell off the gold Buddha the Buddha angrily said: " I hated that horrible shell"? Or do you think the Buddha blessed the shell that served to protect him from being stolen away from his home?

I am grateful for the clay that has protected me all this time - but the golden treasure that lies inside of me - is ready to face the world...I just need a bit of polishing.

XOXO
BT&HB

The Storm Inside.

On Friday February 8, 2013 - mother nature unleashed a massive snow storm on my city.  I am not going to give you a run down of how bad it was and how much fell, just that yes, I did drive to work while every news station was telling everyone to stay off the roads.  Because people did, there was no where near the volume of traffic there normally is.  With my angels protection, I got to work and home safely. 

I woke that morning with a shaky feeling in me, all my senses were vibrating and I could not, calm or ground myself.  I am empathic to the feelings of others and the universe, and the storm that was raging outside...was also raging in me.  It took me all day to figure out why I felt so uneasy.  Even after they let us leave work early, and I was home safe...the vibrating was still going on.  No matter what I did, warm coffee, meditation, crystal healing, reading, napping, food - nothing, nothing would quell that raging feeling in me. 

I felt like a live wire, I cried, I was angry, and I was sad all in one.  I tried to keep my wits about me and think only good thoughts, my affirmations always make me smile, but that day, it caused me only more stress...it was as if something was raging to get out - and I figured out what that is...it is the human race and what we have become. 

I am a person who doesn't have many friends, I know many people and love each one of them...but close friends, I don't have many of, and as of late...this makes me really sad, but at the same time...hopeful and excited.  I realized that some people in my life have to go, I need to be surrounded with people who are playing the woe is me card, people who are open minded and not afraid to get to know someone just for the sake of knowing, people who love and truly want what is best for themselves - which will translate what is best for me and the universe....people, who know the difference between real live human friends, and on-line ones. 

I understand and accept that this is how the world is today, but to be faced with people daily who would much rather socialize with people they have never met and don't know ( honestly, I think that if the on-line relationships would meet - they would not like each other, or worst, see that while on-line they are witty and charming and funny, in person - not so much).  So I asked myself this, and I set my intentions to find people who are honest, loving, kind and truthful ...I am done with the liars, the woe is me, the victims, the downers...and the negative people ...I out grew them, I have grown and now my circle of friends will grow with me. 

So from today on, I am starting my new life everyday.  I am approaching every experience in a new frame of mind- and with a new state of consciousness.  I want the noblest and best for myself in every respect...when you think this way, great wonders are possible.

xoxo
BT&HB