In honour of Valentine's Day ( or Vile Day as my friend Kenny and I call it), I figured what better way to honour the day of love - write about love - or more to the point, my love for fictional characters.
This thought came to me when I finished reading an advance readers copy of a book called The Vampire Stalker by Allison Van Diepen. The book explores the idea of literary physics and how books show us what is going on in another dimension. Books also transport us out of our worlds, just like the movies, they let us escape our lives for a couple of hours and make us hope and dream, cry and laugh..and fall in love.
My friends can vouch and tell you that when I read a book that I can't shut up about, I fall in love with the characters sometimes for all the things they are, and sometimes all the things they aren't. Ya, sure I have fallen in love with characters in movies because they are good looking ( or like my sister would say..." he is a five alarm fire, and there are not enough fire trucks to put out how hot he is.."), but characters in books are different. You have to create an image of what they would look like, sound like and be like. When you picture the type of man or woman you would like to meet and have to love, it seems like we pick things from all the media around us. If someone would ask me who would be my ideal male, he would be part....
* David Beckham ( just because the man has it all)
* Hugh Jackman ( Sab, that one is for you..)
* Edward Cullen ( I know, I know, he is a 118 year old virgin vampire..but still hot)
* Chuck Bass ( everyone loves a bad boy, and he is rich and is the only man who can wear purple pants and still look sexy).
* Alessandro Salimbeni from the Book called " Juliet" by Anne Fortier ( I am just a sucker for Italian men).
* Matthew Clairmont from the book " a discovery of witches " by Deborah Harkness, please just trust me, the man is the most well mannered and beautiful soul ever.
* Alexander Banks from the book " the vampire stalker" by Allison Van Diepen - just read his words, what man tells a woman she is enchanting??
* and last but not least, how could I even think about forgetting Mr. Darcy and my beloved Romeo ( and it still stands, my first born will be called Romeo) ....
The book got me thinking...how could I be so drawn to certain characters and dislike others? How is it that with all that I have been through and of all the men that I have dated, know that they are not likely to be rich, hot, have hair like David Beckham, or tell me I am enchanting, but I still believe that my David/Hugh/Chuck/Edward/Matthew/Alessandro/Alexander/Darcy/Romeo - could be out there looking for me??? Because I believe, I believe in love and know that when you love yourself, you are more lovable, that the need for love, is different than being needy for love. Love is not something that happens to you, it is something that you do.
I might be home on Valentine's day this year..and I am fine with it, because I am with the person I didn't love for a long time, someone who I treated badly, even though they always loved me no matter what I did, this year I am spending time with me, yes that is right, me, because I am the one who is going to have to look at myself each day for the rest of my life in the mirror, so this Valentine's day, treat yourself, tell yourself how enchanting you are, tell yourself you love you...trust me, Self love is the most important love of all...without it, we could never love another.
To all that know me, you know how much I put my heart into everything, not matter if it is a book, a handbag, shoes, my friends or my work...I don't love half way...my heart is too filled with love for all of you, and you all, each have taught me how to love.
xoxo
BT & HB
Monday, February 14, 2011
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Positive vs Negative
"Positive feelings invite intimacy and engagement. Negative feelings invite isolation and alienation." Joan Borysenko,Ph.D. - from Minding the Body, Mending the Mind
As 2010 was coming to a close, I took a long hard look at my life. For the most part, I struggled with the same things that many have struggled with since for as long as we can remember, I have been fortunate, lucky, grateful, thankful, blessed and strong. But I have also, loved and lost, been laughed at, left out, put down, knocked out, frowned upon and belittled.
One thing that I always seemed to have no matter if I faced an angel or a devil, was the power of positive thought. Don't get me wrong, my positive thoughts were not always very powerful ( sometimes they were, I just wasn't ready to hear them). Someone once told me, " God took a gift from you, but gave you another, don't waste it.." I had no idea what that man meant at the time, but the more I slipped into the pit of hell - the more I felt protected. That made me see people for who they truly are, and the more I thought more positively, the better off I was.
I use to moan about not having the perfect body, not enough money, no respect at work, friends who constantly used me, family that made me feel like a poor relation...until one day I realized that it was my thoughts that drew the bad people and all those things to me. The battle is not with the outside world it is within you. The hardest person to say I love you too, is yourself. If you think and speak positive, only good will come. Think about how when you are negative about something, everything looks negative, the situation never gets better. But when you choose to think and speak with happy and positive thoughts and words...your world does become a whole lot better.
In my life, I have come across a whole world full of people, some are the best people you could ever encounter, and some, not so much. The difference is in there thinking, some would bitch about the same thing, over and over ( until I could no longer stand to be around them), and the others, would always say, if it is God's will, and see the good in even the worst situations. My mother told me a couple of years ago, that during a very dark time in my life when I was in an abusive relationship ( my positive thoughts were turned off at that time..) that when she didn't know how else to help me, she prayed to God and said, " I leave her in your hands.." to this day, that still makes me cry with the beauty of faith that my mother has in God. When your child is suffering, and there is nothing left to do, you place your positive trust in God.
So, we are now in month two of 2011, I am in a very positive place right now with myself, I love life & me, am grateful for everyday, I think positive thoughts and things that make me feel good about myself. I have set myself goals, and I know that I can do it, because nothing can knock down the power of a positive thought.
Ask yourself ....
Who are we and why are we here? What's the definition of a life well lived?? Are you answers positive or negative??...the choice is up to you, make it the right one.
xoxo
BT&HB
As 2010 was coming to a close, I took a long hard look at my life. For the most part, I struggled with the same things that many have struggled with since for as long as we can remember, I have been fortunate, lucky, grateful, thankful, blessed and strong. But I have also, loved and lost, been laughed at, left out, put down, knocked out, frowned upon and belittled.
One thing that I always seemed to have no matter if I faced an angel or a devil, was the power of positive thought. Don't get me wrong, my positive thoughts were not always very powerful ( sometimes they were, I just wasn't ready to hear them). Someone once told me, " God took a gift from you, but gave you another, don't waste it.." I had no idea what that man meant at the time, but the more I slipped into the pit of hell - the more I felt protected. That made me see people for who they truly are, and the more I thought more positively, the better off I was.
I use to moan about not having the perfect body, not enough money, no respect at work, friends who constantly used me, family that made me feel like a poor relation...until one day I realized that it was my thoughts that drew the bad people and all those things to me. The battle is not with the outside world it is within you. The hardest person to say I love you too, is yourself. If you think and speak positive, only good will come. Think about how when you are negative about something, everything looks negative, the situation never gets better. But when you choose to think and speak with happy and positive thoughts and words...your world does become a whole lot better.
In my life, I have come across a whole world full of people, some are the best people you could ever encounter, and some, not so much. The difference is in there thinking, some would bitch about the same thing, over and over ( until I could no longer stand to be around them), and the others, would always say, if it is God's will, and see the good in even the worst situations. My mother told me a couple of years ago, that during a very dark time in my life when I was in an abusive relationship ( my positive thoughts were turned off at that time..) that when she didn't know how else to help me, she prayed to God and said, " I leave her in your hands.." to this day, that still makes me cry with the beauty of faith that my mother has in God. When your child is suffering, and there is nothing left to do, you place your positive trust in God.
So, we are now in month two of 2011, I am in a very positive place right now with myself, I love life & me, am grateful for everyday, I think positive thoughts and things that make me feel good about myself. I have set myself goals, and I know that I can do it, because nothing can knock down the power of a positive thought.
Ask yourself ....
Who are we and why are we here? What's the definition of a life well lived?? Are you answers positive or negative??...the choice is up to you, make it the right one.
xoxo
BT&HB
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